"There's no better way to pay homage to our fallen brothers than by letting it rip, hitting that ramp at full ****ing blast, and flying through the sky high above the Vietnam Memorial," said Biden, noting that he also plans to execute a midair salute by placing his fingers around his mouth in a V shape and rapidly flicking his tongue. "If I grease the landing and ragdoll across the Constitution Gardens, so be it. I've had my share of spills."
Biden told reporters he has spent all his free time over the past two weeks preparing for the perilous feat by tuning up his bike, overseeing construction of the plywood ramps, and personally installing a "*****in'" sound system that will blast a to-be-determined John Mellencamp song from 20 different speakers during the jump.
"Anyway, I'll have a helmet on, and of course I'll be wearing my star-spangled red, white, and blue leather jumpsuit," Biden said. "It zips down real low, and I plan to keep it open. The ladies can follow the treasure trail to a little patch action."
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